In 1933, Albert Einstein is quoted, “Any power must be an enemy of mankind which enslaves the individual by power and by force, whether it arises under the Fascist or the Communist flag. All that is valuable in human society depends upon the opportunity for development accorded to the individual.”
It pains me to watch Ella desperately compare herself to others. Whether its around which silly bands she owns, how high she can (or can’t) climb a tree, or staring at the every move of the older kids as the ‘hang out’ on the street here in Sicily. She needs to connect to the world through external means as she does not feel an easy connection internally. I get it. I remember worrying about this myself when I was a kid. I was never naturally comfortable around too many people and always suffered at my slow and inaccurate memory of TV show theme songs or other trendy bits of knowledge. I felt the lack of my conformity to my peers.
However I came to revel in being a bit weird. I found my strength in that. I want Ella to celebrate her differences.
This morning she chose to buy a red dress just like mommy. There were other worthy choices available but she could not be swayed away from the red one. It’s a cute dress, just a bit too big. She remembered picking out my dress for me last year and wanted to pick this one for her. Bonding with mommy is not the same as conforming but it does trigger my worry for future peer pressure. In Sicily, few act alone. No one goes to the movies or a restaurant alone. It’s communal thinking all the time. Vestiges of Fascism come out it many ways in Southern Italy. Folks are extremely judgemental, suspicious of liberal ideas, and, in general, afraid to rock the boat. In the US, too many years emphasizing standardized testing and rote memorization isn’t helping our personal mission. We will teach Ella to listen to herself and not follow the crowd. Let’s hope the American school system gets the memo on this matter asap.
Eventually we did get to our daily lesson today. It started off very rough. She was tired, thirsty and hungry. She couldn’t concentrate and couldn’t tell the difference between the J, U and Y in July. But I used our bonding experience of the morning to smooth over her mood. We took a picture of our matching dresses and talked about the new bicycle waiting for her downstairs if only she could get through a bit of work.
She did it. We only lasted 30 minutes but she did it. And she couldn’t help but turn the S into a Teddy Bear Fairy.I think she felt accomplished afterward. I was exhausted.
Distraction/Tangent:
